ZACH OUTMAN
Q: What inspired you to write “Carpe DMs” and focus on the modern dating experience?
A: I won’t pretend most of the personal motivation for the song is from my own experiences in the dating world, but I’ve also seen countless friends and family going through similar things as I have. Often times there seems to be a game of who cares less being played, and bouncing from one text or DM thread to another.
Q: Do you feel social media has changed the way people connect emotionally today?
A: I do. I think we as humans all have a bit of a nascent drive to achieve more, be more, and see more. That feeling of insatiable wants. Social media and the internet in general have given us the ability to constantly see all these things other people have and what they’re doing and all these beautiful places to visit. That reinforces the drive to go go go, and the quick hits of dopamine that we get swiping and scrolling reinforces instant gratification as a requirement in our lives. This has fundamentally changed us and how we interact with each other, which of course has also made dating change.
Q: How much of the song comes from personal experiences you’ve lived through yourself?
A: All of it. The experiences of others certainly reinforces and affects my thoughts and perspective on things, but generally speaking my songs are pure forms of expression based on personal experience.
Q: What made you want to explore themes like ghosting and emotional distance in the song?
A: A good friend of mine, Cam, came up with the title as a bit of a joke in 2019 when we were going back and forth coming up with ridiculous song names. This one stuck for some reason, and it resonated enough that I wrote a song around it in 2020. Expressing things in songwriting is something I do when I can’t quite come up with the words in another way, and my efforts in dating have not gone well for me overall. This was something I needed to get out, and now it’s out for the world to see.
Q: Do you think people today are more afraid of emotional commitment than before?
A: I do. I think the availability of information and constantly seeing and hearing stories from friends, family, and online makes people more prone to alternating between avoidant and anxious attachment styles. From experience, dating in that state leads to some heavy burnout and then you just give up entirely. Then it feels easier to not even bother.
Q: There’s a feeling of emotional burnout in the lyrics. Was that an important emotion for you to capture?
A: Absolutely. I probably should have read this question before I wrote out my previous answer, but maybe not. The burnout that comes for anyone after going through a single “talking” phase over the course of 6-8 weeks just to have someone vanish without a trace from your life is heavy. Going through the multiple times can really take a toll, and I think it’s important when seriously dating that we give each other a little bit of grace for the fear that is inevitable in someone who has gone through something like that. I hope this song is taken not just as an editorialized view of modern dating, but also a call out of something that could use with some behavioral change on a large scale.
Q: Your lyrics feel conversational and very real. How important is authenticity in your songwriting?
A: I do have a few songs that I wrote more off of an outside concept or idea or even satirically, but for the most part my songs are very personal. These are genuine thoughts and feelings given form through music, and I hope they always come off as pure and authentic because I’m more or less baring my soul to however many strangers hear the song. I’d say authenticity is the most important aspect of songwriting for me.
Q: Were there any artists or bands that inspired the lyrical direction of “Carpe DMs”?
A: Honestly I have a lot of influences in music, but I’m not sure I could pinpoint anyone specifically on the lyrical direction. The production of this song really combined a lot of things for me, and it was a lot of fun to make. Maybe a little bit of Fallout Boy meets Matchbox 20 on the lyrical aspect.
Q: The song talks a lot about avoiding pain before feelings become too deep. Why do you think so many people relate to that idea?
A: Many of us have been the avoidant in a relationship or potential relationship and when you get in that mode you are more or less a ticking time bomb. There’s a clock running on when things are going to end and rather than give a real effort we build up walls and distance and find reasons to sabotage or run from the relationship. Emotional pain terrifies people because there’s no real blueprint for healing, and it’s not a type of pain an ace bandage and 800mg Ibuprofen can help.
Q: Did you always know the song would blend country storytelling with pop and hip-hop influences?
A: From the conception I wanted the song to have a hip-hop aspect to it. That’s just what I heard in my head. At that point I only had the first verse written with an acoustic guitar riff, bass line, and drum beat to match. The song evolved a ton from there, but it stayed true to my vision and I’m very happy with how it turned out.
Q: How important was it for you to make the lyrics relatable to younger listeners navigating online dating?
A: I didn’t have an kind of age range in my head when I wrote the song, but as much as dating evolves the older you get, so much of it also stays the same. I think heartbreak is heartbreak whether it happens at 18 or 45, and our hearts can be delicate things.
Q: What do you hope listeners take away emotionally after hearing “Carpe DMs”?
A: I’d hope for some self-reflection and possibly behavioral and emotional growth, but I would settle for people feeling seen and understood. None of us like feeling alone or abandoned, and even if it’s not worth much of anything I sympathize with anyone going through a heartbreak.
Q: Your music often feels honest and reflective. Do you find songwriting therapeutic in any way?
A: Songwriting is extremely therapeutic for me, and to use another word it can be very cathartic. I’ve found that songs flow when they’re ready, and that normally means that I’m ready to express something. Coming to terms with those feelings and emotions that are often bottled up on a shelf and ignored for who knows how long is a beautiful thing. 2019-2021 I think I wrote about 45 or 50 songs. I only wrote a couple in 2022, and in 2023 I wrote a song about how I hadn’t written a song in so long called “All My Pain’s On Paper.” I hope that one gets released one day too.
Q: With over 40 songs waiting to be released, do many of them explore similar emotional themes?
A: The only song I have a planned release for is “Pain in the Ass” set for September 4th of this year. That one is a more upbeat, traditional pop country song about a woman that has me dialed in. That ones more fun, but I certainly have a lot of emo and emo adjacent songs. As I mentioned, a lot of them came through the pandemic and shortly after, but many of the songs do follow the theme of dating and experiences in the sphere of love and relationships.
Q: Where do you see your songwriting evolving after a track like “Carpe DMs”?
A: I honestly am not sure. I currently have a few songs that are partially written, but I’m looking for the right sound before moving forward with them. At the studio when we were finishing up Carpe DMs my producer, Abbey said “I think you might have found your sound, Zach.” She might be right, and maybe a cross-over style will be my move on newer songs and even modifying older ones to fit that vibe. I guess we’ll all find out together.
